Holiday Dinner Ettiquette

Thanksgiving is next week. (I'll let that soak in for a bit)

Attending and Hosting holiday dinners, be it Thanksgiving or Christmas, is stressful in most cases. Hosting can be particularly unnerving, especially if it's your first time. I have been to several holiday dinners that have been equally stressful as well. Hopefully, these easy and inexpensive tips will help you be successful whether you're hosting or attending

Hosting

Keep it simple. The less you worry about, the more enjoyable your dinner and hosting experience will be. Delegate! Delegating tasks is crucial. Repeat this to yourself: "I cannot and will not do this alone." Repeat it every day if you need it. You cannot bear the emotional and financial burden alone. Send out a mass text or email long before the meal asking people to sign up to bring certain items. This will be a huge relief to you as you continue to plan the meal and entertainment. 

The Meal

Pie should be made the day before as you brine and season your turkey. Most of them can sit at room temperature overnight, but if you're worried about this, open a window in a bathroom, extra bedroom or laundry room, close the door, and plug any gaps under the door from the outside. You have now created a huge refrigerator. Use the fact that you live in the northern hemisphere to your advantage.

Take care of yourself first. Do your hair and makeup-if you wear makeup-and look how you want to look before anyone gets there. Then, and only then, you can concentrate on the meal. Bonus-if someone arrives early, you're not caught off-guard and unprepared. You may need a freshening-up, but that will not take nearly as long.

Traditionally, appetizers are laid out when everyone arrives for dinner. DO THIS! This will get your guests out of your way in the kitchen as you finish up the last bits of prep. Pick easy or even store-prepared appetizers. Some great ones are - the olive bar, have the deli slice some salami or prosciutto along with some nice cheese to lay out with crackers. I am also a major fan of the cheese ball. This is a must in my house because it reminds me of my late grandmother. 

Just remember throughout the entire planning stage to keep it simple. You'll thank me later, I promise.

As far as the meal and hosting goes, I believe that the host and hostess should just provide the turkey and a few pies. Obviously this depends on how many guests you will be having for dinner.. If required, make as little number of side dishes as possible, as hosting should count for a major contribution.

The Table

Setting the table is important as well. Consider purchasing a roll of brown butcher paper and taping it to the top of your table as your tablecloth. Write the person's name on the paper instead of using place cards. Then place colored markers all over the table and have everyone write a few things they're grateful for. Triple whammy-decoration, place cards, and entertainment in one. As far as the actual centerpiece, all you really need is either one or three SHORT floral arrangements. Keep them short so that your guests can see and converse with each other. Have you ever been to a wedding with centerpieces right at eye-level? Don't make that mistake. 

Entertainment

You can find pretty much any game on the internet, but here are a few easy and fun ideas. The show "Minute to Win It" has some really fun and intense games you can play using generic household items. We also go around the table and each say what we are grateful for. Be careful with this, though. Not everyone is as comfortable doing this with others around. Make sure to know your audience and plan appropriately. Growing up, after Thanksgiving dinner, we usually watched a Christmas movie while we napped and lounged, then we put up the Christmas tree. Again, remember to keep it simple, and you can't go wrong.

Attending a Holiday Dinner

When you are invited to a dinner for the holidays, proper etiquette requires a thank you and offer to help. Depending on your relationship with the host, a call is typically appropriate. As evidenced above, hosting is quite overwhelming, so a nice call thanking your host for inviting you to dinner and asking, "How can I help you?" will be much appreciated. If your host still seems overwhelmed, be prepared with two or three suggestions of things you do well that would help him or her with the monumental task of the meal. Great ideas of what to bring are: appetizers, pies, sides, drinks, offer to set the table or create a tablescape, offer to come help cook the day before, or even help clean their house the day before. If someone offered to help do that for me, I'd be elated.

Arrive on time. This is incredibly important. Arriving early or late is disrespectful if your host has not specifically requested that you do so. Dress in nice, casual clothes, be helpful, and be kind.

Last, but not least, ALWAYS help with cleanup. The last thing the host should do after cooking for you is clean up after you too. Men, women, and kid should "bus plus two." As many people that are able to help with dishes definitely should. My personal philosophy is to leave every space better than when I found it.

If you follow these tips, your host will have you back...often.

Happy Holidays from our family to yours.